Attempting to Know Everything

I like to think that I know quite a bit about nature. I can identify most of the plants and animals I come across, and even tell you how they interact with their ecosystems. But, unfortunately, it’s not an easy task to learn every species out there, and it’s one I’ve struggled with. I may have a couple degrees in biology and ecology, but I’ve always felt like I know nothing about the environment around me. My friends and family would always ask me “what king of frog is that” or “what kind of bird is this” or “why is that tree growing so weird”, and I would have to tell them I didn’t know, and after saying “I don’t know” for the 157th time I began to question if I knew anything at all. I was starting to think that the six and a half years I spent in school had been a waste of time. So, to get over this I decided I needed to learn everything about every species there is so I could start giving them some real answers. Then I could feel good about myself as a biologist, ecologist, and a naturalist.

I began by purchasing every identification book I came across — books about birds, butterflies, insects, amphibians, reptiles, trees, wildflowers, grasses, and even freshwater macroinvertebrates. Then I downloaded all the apps I could find for birding and plant identification too. I spent my time reading and researching, trying to memorize species for months so that I could be a useful guide to curious people in the outdoors. Then, one day I went on a hike with my fiancé and her friend, ready to put my newfound knowledge to the test, only to realize that the plants and animals do not always look like the pictures in the books. I still couldn’t answer their questions, and I still felt like a failure.

I actually gave up on trying to identify any new species for quite a while after that. The task seemed insurmountable. So, for the time being I just continued on with school and accepted the fact that I could never learn everything about the environment around me. The following fall semester, I was assigned as a teaching assistant to an applied ecology course under a professor who was extremely into birding. He was tall and lanky, wore glasses, and always had a pair of binoculars in his hands. I spent the next few months being amazed at his ability to identify any bird from the faintest chirp or the quickest flash of color darting from bush to bush, but there was one day in particular that stood out to me. We were in the grasslands of central Oklahoma working with students to dig up invasive earthworms when we saw a flash of orange shoot out of the grass for a split second before diving back down. He instantly knew what it was — a LeConte’s Sparrow. He giddily paced towards where the sparrow disappeared, and while he walked, he told me that he hadn’t seen one of these birds in Oklahoma for a few years and was excited that they were back. Soon after, I was watching a 6 foot 6, 40-year-old man prance across a field after a group of sparrows with a giant smile on his face. As I stood back with the class, I remember being jealous. Jealous of how much joy a group of birds brought him, jealous of how much fun he was having in nature, and jealous that I had forgotten what that feeling was like.

That day convinced me to start my naturalist journey again, but with a different goal this time. I remembered that I loved nature, and this was supposed to be fun. I learned to find joy in the process, to get excited about seeing something I didn’t know because it meant I had the opportunity to learn something new. Over time, with my new mindset I started to make substantial progress that I was proud of. I realized that knowing every species of plant and animal is basically impossible — I mean, there are over 30,000 species of flowering plants in North America alone without considering the 800 plus bird species and all the other living organisms out there. So, ultimately, I decided to stop worrying about the insurmountable task of knowing everything. Now, I learn them one by one, bird by bird, tree by tree, and I enjoy myself along the way.

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