Your Guide to Setting Healthy Workplace Boundaries

Your journey to emotional and mental well-being beginning in your personal life shouldn’t end the moment you walk into work. Healthy personal boundaries and relationships are only one part of the well-being equation. Your workplace is another. Unfortunately, we tend to overlook the healthy change that’s possible at work, believing we’re limited to the tone set by managers and coworkers.

As Clinical Psychologist, Henry Cloud advised:

Our jobs are our livelihood. We never want to give our employer a reason to be let go. Therefore, more often than not, we’ll default to being overly agreeable. The danger is, if we do it regularly, we end up becoming people-pleasers. When we put others before ourselves, our emotional and physical energy becomes depleted, leaving us feeling stressed and unhappy. If this sounds familiar to you, you may not have established clear workplace boundaries for yourself.

In her book Rising Strong, Brené Brown, vulnerability expert and researcher, explains:

What is a boundary then? Brown defines boundaries as “simply our lists of what’s okay and what’s not okay.” Note how personal the definition is — what’s okay for one person might not be for another. Knowing your ‘lists’ will allow you to maintain good emotional and mental health in your life.

How do you set boundaries? It’s as simple as clearly communicating them and explaining why the boundary is important to you. Don’t feel the urge to overexplain. You, and only you, are the judge of ‘what’s okay and what’s not okay’ for yourself. What’s also key is communicating when a boundary is crossed. You want to do this promptly so that your coworkers understand its impact on your well-being.

Here are three types of boundaries you can set for yourself at work:

In the simplest form, communication boundaries are how you want to be addressed, including personal pronoun preferences, name abbreviations and even pronunciations. For example, if you prefer the pronouns, they/them, indicating your preference in your email signature, or workplace intranet portal, is an excellent way to inform coworkers outside of directly telling them. Similarly, you can also leverage the same mediums to educate people on how you would like your name pronounced, such as indicating the name ‘Pelin’ rhymes with ‘Celine.’

Communication boundaries are also the parameters you put around conversations, such as not wanting to gossip with coworkers or discuss specific topics at work. Topics such as political and religious affiliations may unintentionally lead to divisive conversations. Note, however, sometimes uncomfortable discussions at management levels are required to initiate change for the well-being of all employees, such as the Black Lives Matter movement.

Further, communication boundaries can also extend to tone and attitude. Negative tones and attitudes impact employee morale and productivity and, if widespread, create a toxic working atmosphere. A professional environment should always aim to be polite and professional. Anything outside that is unacceptable and requires clear workplace boundaries to shift and, in some cases, involves escalation to senior management.

Most organizations have a Code of Conduct policy that outlines the respectful way employees must interact with each other. Use this as a reference in your conversations, especially if you feel the tone and attitude used toward you are impacting your morale and well-being.

Interpersonal boundaries set the dynamic for employee-coworkers and employee-management relationships. These are especially important as undefined interpersonal boundaries can lead to one party taking advantage of the other, or worst case, workplace bullying.

In a simple context, you might want to set a healthy boundary that involves keeping your personal life separate from your work life. As examples, you may choose not to add coworkers to your social media accounts, partake in off-work social gatherings or even talk about your personal life.

Interpersonal boundaries can also set the tone for employee-manager relationships. While it’s your manager’s responsibility to layout job accountabilities and responsibilities, clarifying job-specific boundaries like who you report to, who assigns your work and how you receive feedback will set the parameters of your work and how you engage with others.

As an example, if you’ve clarified work assignments with your manager, but an assertive coworker is providing you additional work in defiance, you can communicate the job boundary agreed to by your manager as you refuse the extra work. Note that you utilize the interpersonal boundary by bravely deciding not to be taken advantage of by your assertive coworker.

Further, while there is little room to negotiate with your direct manager on key performance indicators and job roles, how that information is conveyed to you is an area you can set your interpersonal boundary.

For instance, how do you want to receive feedback? If your monthly performance reviews consist of heavy criticisms rather than constructive feedback, you can raise it as a boundary parameter and ask that feedback be productive with guidance on how you can improve.

Your time is limited and valuable, both to you and to your employer, who is compensating you for your output. With that in mind, healthy time boundaries will aim to keep you efficient and productive while maintaining your emotional and mental well-being.

Time boundaries you set can help you avoid burnout and maintain a work-life balance. Limiting email after work hours, not being available during vacation, and refraining from bringing your laptop home are examples of basic time parameters you can choose to apply.

Within the workplace, limiting personal conversations or blocking time to work without disruption can help you maintain your productivity and avoid stressful crunch times.

Space boundaries dictate the parameters for the physical space around you — including your personal ‘bubble’ and your workspace. In an age where workspaces are shared, it is even more critical to set parameters for your area of work, including storage space, desk requirements and ergonomic necessities.

Physical touch is also considered a space boundary. Determining the limits of your personal ‘bubble’ or space will help to set ‘what’s okay and what’s not okay’ for you. Does it make you uncomfortable if a coworker touches your arm, assuming no foul play? It is essential to define your physical parameters and clearly communicate them, especially if you are uncomfortable.

Every situation is different and has its nuances. Consider these nuances in your approach to setting and communicating your boundaries. The most important thing is that you are honouring yourself in the process.

And, as Michelle Obama stated:

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